The Wind Began to Switch...

So, I've mentioned that my sister and I were a little high strung when we were younger. Among our biggest concerns were thunderstorms and tornados. Even the slightest turn in the weather led us to wringing our hands as we watched the skies. We'd flip between the local channels to keep a vigilant eye on the radar, and one time we gathered supplies in case our family got trapped in the basement (the supplies consisted of an orange, a beach towel, and some mis-matched batteries).

Then, when we were in sixth grade, the movie "Twister" came out. And it fucked. my. sister. up. For, like, a solid four months, she had the exact same conversation with one or both of our parents.


Amy: Mom/Dad, is there going to be a tornado today?

Parent(s): No.

Amy: But how do you know for sure?

Parent(s): ...


Just a near-constant anxiety, every day, until winter. Eventually, we both grew out of our fear of bad weather. Mostly. We still call to check on each other during really bad storms.

The Sardonic Fortune Cookie

Best fortune I ever got

P.S. Did you know that fortune cookies are not really Chinese? Like, not at all. They were invented in the U.S. and the recipe was actually based on a Japanese cracker. In fact, during the 90s they were sold in China as "genuine American fortune cookies." 

I know. Mind = Blown.

The Real World: Geriatric Unit

Damn fool kids need to go home and go to bed.

MTV recently started airing yet another season of The Real World. And for the first time ever, I have absolutely no interest in watching it. For a while there, it was one of my favorite shows, but now it mostly just makes me feel old.

When I watched it back in the day, I'd find myself thinking things like, "That would be so much fun," and "New Orleans looks like an awesome place to get drunk." But now it's mostly things like, "Wasn't that technically sexual assault?" and "That girl is going to wind up with HPV if she isn't careful."

Growing up feels weird.