Tuesday, July 23, 2013

My Mother the Terrorist


A couple of years ago, my mom decided to fly down to Oklahoma to visit her sister.  Everything was going according to plan until she got to airport security. (So I guess that means everything was going according to plan for, like, thirty minutes.)

When her bags went through the x-ray machine, the TSA agent asked her to step aside. She politely obliged, a little confused. The guy started rummaging through her carry-on bag and called over a bunch of additional security officers who shot her some very stern looks.

"Ma'am," one of them said to her. "We're going to need you to come with us."

She followed them to a little room where the officers confronted her about the live ammunition in her luggage. That's right, live ammunition.

She was shocked and indignant for, like, a second before the pieces started falling together in her head. The bag she was using as her carry-on was the duffle bag my dad uses for everything. Including target shooting. And he had left a half empty box of bullets in an inner compartment that my mom didn't check before packing.

She tried to explain what had happened and had mostly convinced the officers when out of frustration she muttered, "Ugh. I am going to kill Mark [my dad]." Then she got in trouble all over again for making terroristic threats in an airport.

So, yeah, fun fact: My mom is definitely on the NSA watch list.


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