Wednesday, January 23, 2013

The Masochistic Snack Choice


I'll cut a bitch.
A girl at work always eats Triscuits. I don't know how she does it. In fact, I am surprised that anyone willingly chooses and enjoys them as a snack.

Triscuits have a major design flaw. They are way too sharp. They scrape the shit out of the roof of your mouth. Every time. And a few of those grainy little splinters always break off and get jabbed into your gums.

And it's not like you go through all that to enjoy some delicious ranch or fake cheese flavor. They just taste like plain wheat. And a little bit of blood.

4 comments:

Sunny Day said...

I happen to think that they are fantastic. And I offer them to a girl at work whenever I have them, but she always turns me down - for the same reason you state here. I asked her if she knew about 'Cap'n Crunch Mouth' but she looked at me funny. http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Cap'n%20Crunch%20mouth

Amanda said...

Sounds to me like someone needs to toughen up their mouth! The more you eat them the more you build up a tolerance to Triscuit splinters.

Marie Muenchow said...

Maybe I'm alone here, but I don't think you should ever have to build up a tolerance to enjoy a snack.

Marie Muenchow said...

Just looked it up. Cap'n Crunch Mouth is exactly what Triscuits do! Bit of a misnomer if you ask me.